For the past few days, laging bumibisita si @sandstorm. Bestfriends na nga kami e pero yung iba, bv sa kanya. :)) 

Dahil kay bestfriend, wala kaming pasok ngayon and I have mixed emotions about this. First, I’m happy kasi nakakatamad talagang pumasok. Second, I’m sad coz I won’t see my friends. :( Awww. Third, I’m somewhat annoyed kasi nag-effort pa naman akong mag-ayos ng sarili ko. Cute ko pa naman ngayon. :))

Anyway, since walang pasok, I’ll take this opportunity to study na lang. Exam week na e. Pero baka sayang lang ulit yung effort ko; mawalan ulit ng pasok dahil kay bestfriend. 

Haay. Bahala na. #out

Kahapon ang Science Defense namin. There is this one word that can explain everything that happened during our defense and that is F-A-I-L. I made a fool of myself answering the questions of the panelists. *died of embarrassment* 

The only upside is that I had fun afterwards. Secrets were opened, teases were made, and laughs filled our classroom. Also, I felt closer to people I wasn’t close to before. :)

Oh yeah, when I saw him, at first, of course I was giddy and felt butterflies in my stomach but as I kept seeing him (not in a “we’re dating” sense), I felt, how do you say this…tired? I can’t exactly explain it but being in his presence for a long time made me feel like “sawa” na of him. Maybe it’s just that I’m not comfortable around him or maybe pretending to be not interested in him made me really tired.

I don’t understand this feeling anymore but I hope that it would develop into something positive. Positive being the operative word.

I never expected to like that guy, especially since I’m still in the stage of moving on from a different guy. I guess love is just like that. 

It started with the practice for prom…

When they announced who gets to be the partner of who, I was nervous. I wasn’t close to the seniors so I prayed to God that my partner be someone who I could easily be comfortable with. Well, God gave that person.

So, we practiced the dances and since he’s the one who taught them, I had to “sabayan” him and not make a fool of myself while I were at it.

I think my heart started beating faster than usual when we started practicing for the dance. At first, it was awkward because I’m not close to him but I respected him as a “senior”. I just followed his lead whenever he says something. We were then just dance partners to each other. But as we practiced more, I became comfortable being with him and just as a lighting would suddenly appear out of nowhere, butterflies started up in my stomach.

Our teacher who was in-charge of us then kept telling us to make eye contact. That was a difficult feat for me, I mean, hello…awkward to the highest level. And he kept telling me to smile; how can I when I’m nervous around him? I didn’t want to do anything that would be a turn off for him. Well, I wasn’t expecting anything but a girl can hope, right? :D

And then came prom…

Of course, I danced with him since he was my dance partner but when it was time for the “free dance”, I didn’t expect him to dance with me. I thought that we were only obliged to dance with our partners in the ceremony, not our partners in the waltz since we already danced. Well, anyway, we danced. :)) If I were to watch that scene where he asked me to dance with him at an audience’s view, it would have been cute. ^^ When dancing, he kept telling me to just enjoy, smile, and look him in the eyes. The first two, I can do but the third…well, you get the idea. :) A slow song was playing then and I had my arms around him. It’s an image I will never forget but I didn’t realize that I like him then. It is only a few days after prom, when I saw him again, did I realize that I like him.

At school, I felt like I had to get closer with him if I wanted him to acknowledge my existence because if I don’t, I would lose the chance. Every time I see him, butterflies visit again and usually, when that happens, I grin and get giddy. 

I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with this crush of mine but at the moment, I use it as my inspiration. 

Anyway, do you know the song of Hey Monday, Hangover? It is the perfect song for this post. 

‘Til next time. God bless! :3

I can’t stand it when people walk out of my life. It gives me this painful feeling, making me long for something. I get confused afterwards and it isn’t the best thing in the world. My heart seems to beat twice as fast, as if it knows just what is going on in my head. Heck, I don’t even know what’s going on in my own head. All I know is that parting gives me this feeling that makes me realize how short life is and how much of it I wasted. 

I just hope that the time will come when I will never again have this feeling. I don’t like it. It’s making me shake all over. 

Lord God, please help me get over this feeling. Help me get through all the painful goodbyes. Help me get through life. I need Your guidance and assurance. Your presence completes me and gets rid of this feeling. May each and every day of our lives be merry. ^^~

Una sa lahat, gusto kong sabihin na…AYAW KO PANG MAG-FOURTH YEAR! Di ako sure kung ayaw ko lang yung stress or ayaw ko maging yung eldest sa school or an entirely different reason. Kung pwede lang hindi na matapos ang school year na’to at forever high school ako but that would be asking too much and too little at the same time; mamaya niyan may maganda pang mangyari after high school. :D

Prom nga pala namin nung Saturday…birthday ko nun. :)) Akala ko dati formality lang yung prom pero nag-enjoy ako. Pramis, ang saya. :D I’m regretting nga na hindi man lang ako bumabati sa mga seniors kapag nasa school kami kasi nung prom, close lahat ng tao. Walang ilangan. Walang hiyaan. Masaya lahat. Friendly everybody. Haay, how I wish ganun ka saya everyday. *wishful thinking*

Right now, I have this feeling in my chest that is close to regret and not contented. I feel like there is something I forgot to do and will never have the chance to do anymore. I hate this feeling. I just hope that for the rest of the days of my life, everything would be alright and everyday would be wonderful. ^^~

Well, dat’s all for today. ‘Til next time. =)

Di ko alam bakit pero wala ako sa mood ngayon. Hindi naman dahil sa mga problema o sa mga panira ng buhay; basta bad mood ako. amph. >.<

Waaah! Ampanget ng ganito. Wala akong magawang maayos matino. Huhuhu. Hating this feeling. :(

Bahala na. Baka bukas wala na ‘to. Sana. Haaay. OUt! ^^